Holding your water…
Yesterday I wrote about the violence that transgender face on a everyday level. We face much more mundane, but difficult issues as well. The New York Times focused in on an emerging issue that is a huge problem in our lives: bathrooms.
Yep. Bathrooms.
Prior to coming out as transgender (FTM), I got thrown out of women’s bathrooms, hassled by cops for using the women’s restroom, and generally had to hold my water when I was out in public. After coming out nearly ten years ago, I can usually pass in men’s bathrooms but sometimes not.
The bathroom is an intensely personal spot but yet restrooms are public. And boy do people’s buttons get pushed when they think someone of the “wrong” gender is in their restroom.
So many transgender folks just try and make it until they get home or to a restroom that is safe, physically and psychologically.
You may say, “Only in San Francisco.” Well, no. It is spreading across the country. As the NY Times notes:
Elsewhere in the Bay Area, advocates of gender-neutral bathrooms are beginning to make themselves heard. In January, they pressed the board of supervisors of Alameda County to adopt a resolution forbidding discrimination in public facilities, including restrooms, based on gender identity.
Generally when people say only in San Francisco, it is something that I am proud of.
Cuz treating everyone with dignity and respect can’t be all bad, eh?
Yep. Bathrooms.
Prior to coming out as transgender (FTM), I got thrown out of women’s bathrooms, hassled by cops for using the women’s restroom, and generally had to hold my water when I was out in public. After coming out nearly ten years ago, I can usually pass in men’s bathrooms but sometimes not.
The bathroom is an intensely personal spot but yet restrooms are public. And boy do people’s buttons get pushed when they think someone of the “wrong” gender is in their restroom.
So many transgender folks just try and make it until they get home or to a restroom that is safe, physically and psychologically.
You may say, “Only in San Francisco.” Well, no. It is spreading across the country. As the NY Times notes:
Elsewhere in the Bay Area, advocates of gender-neutral bathrooms are beginning to make themselves heard. In January, they pressed the board of supervisors of Alameda County to adopt a resolution forbidding discrimination in public facilities, including restrooms, based on gender identity.
Generally when people say only in San Francisco, it is something that I am proud of.
Cuz treating everyone with dignity and respect can’t be all bad, eh?
2 Comments:
Congratulations on your new Blog, I try to view it daily. During the transitioning process there are certain common hurtles that all of us must face, and one of the big ones is the sandbox issue. For some reason by just placing a male or female sign on the door makes this hallowed ground. Yet when the sign is changed to accept both genders, it’s business as usual. I’m convinced that I have done irreparable damage to my bladder for which I will pay for in my golden years.
I have noticed a pleasant trend at restaurants in San Francisco of more and more gender-neutral restrooms. Having been informed that my position is being deleted because of budget problems, I will be moving to another department which I am sure will bring this problem up again. Keep up the good work.
Jo
Hey,
I love that you call it the sandbox issue.
Let me know if there is anything I can do to help out when you bump over to the new department around the bathroom issue. I work for SEIU Local 790, a union that represents city workers, so shoot me an email if you need help. Obviously, the Human Rights Commission is a great resource as well.
I agree about the restrooms. I suspect the restaurants are doing it because then they only have to install one restroom if it is gender neutral or if you have two gender neutral restrooms, there aren't people standing around in line while a bathroom of the so-called other sex is empty.
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